THE POWER OF AN ANCESTOR

Someone Has to Lay Down the Operating System of the Family

It is no longer news that Governor Ademola Adeleke has won re-election as Governor of Osun State(if you are not a Nigeria Osun is one of the states in Nigeria). But beyond the politics, the campaigns, the dancing, the celebrations and the headlines, there is something else I believe every serious family builder should study The Adeleke family itself.

If you look beyond one election and you will discover something much bigger: A family operating system at work across generations.

The late patriarch, Senator Raji Ayoola Adeleke, the Balogun of Ede, served as a Nigerian senator during the Second Republic between 1979 and 1983. But perhaps one of the most important things he and his wife, Esther Nnena Adeleke, built was not political; They built family. And today, we can see elements of that architecture extending into another generation.

There have been governors, senators, business leaders, institution builders. And now one of Africa’s most globally recognized music stars, Davido. Different personalities, professions and expressions yet an extraordinary capacity to rally around family. Today I want to pay attention to that because it deserves our attention.

WE HAVE MISUNDERSTOOD ANCESTRY

When we mention the word Ancestor many people think an ancestor is simply someone who lived before us. I don’t see it that way. An ancestor is someone who accepts responsibility for what will live after them. You don’t have to wait until you die to become an ancestor. You become one the day you decide: “The dysfunction that came through my bloodline will not continue through me.”

Someone has to become the marker and say the fighting stops here, the inheritance wars stop here, the absence of structure stops here. A new ancestry begins with me.

After years of studying families, I have become convinced that families don’t survive merely because people love one another because love without systems can still produce chaos. Every sustainable family needs an operating system.

- How do we resolve disagreement?

- How do we support one another?

- How do we handle money?

- How do we transfer values?

- How do we protect the family name?

- How do we respond when one member is in crisis?

- How do we bring spouses into the family?

- How do we raise the next generation?

- What happens when the patriarch or matriarch dies?

If these questions have no answers, the family may have affection, but it does not yet have governance. And where governance is absent, personalities eventually take over.

Governor Adeleke has spoken publicly about the strong family bond his parents created. He has said that disagreements exist, but they work through them and that family meetings continue even today. Think about that sitting governor still participates in a family accountability structure.

We saw another expression of family responsibility when Davido became embroiled in a highly publicized paternity controversy. His father, Dr. Adedeji Adeleke - a man not ordinarily known for constantly granting media interviews publicly addressed the allegations and presented the family’s position.

Whether or not one agrees with every action of any family member is beside the point. The systems lesson is this: When pressure came, family showed up.

Strong families don’t necessarily produce perfect people; They build systems capable of responding when imperfect people encounter imperfect situations.

Many families today are fragmented because everybody is waiting for everybody else to change. One sibling won’t call because the other sibling hasn’t called. Cousins who played together as children have become strangers. Children inherit conflicts whose origins they don’t even understand. Then one generation dies and unknowingly hands the next generation an inheritance of resentment. If chaos can be inherited then unity and peace can also be generational. All it takes is one ancestor to rise.

Will you be that ancestor that will take responsibility?

There are 5 steps you can take today but because I don’t want this to be too long I will talk about them next week. But I want you to know that becoming an Ancestor can’t start from a position of ignorance. You must master how to build a transgenerational family starting with yourself and your family.

Our waitlist for a closed community of those who truly wish you build a successful family system will open later today. It is not a free community but affordable and powerful enough to change everything about you. Please don’t join if you wouldn’t be willing to put in the work.

You can join our waitlist https://www.praisefowowedtech.com/family-house-waitlist but while you are at it you can visit www.oyela.ai to run a comprehensive current position audit.

It is a day to take responsibility for your future and that future starts from now.

Be the Ancestor

Praise Fowowe